To Routine or Not?

After a very hectic week of holiday celebrations and extended family time, we have enjoyed bunkering down at home at trying to resume life as normal. Weeks like last week are challenging; on the one hand, we love our families and relish in festivities that bring us together, particularly since Madelyn's arrival. It is so fun to watch our parents and siblings in their respective roles as grandparents and aunts/uncles to Maddy, and we are always touched by how loved she is by those around her. On the other hand, even though we haven't really nailed down specific routines and schedules as of yet, we (and particularly the baby) are easily thrown out of our accustomed groove. After arriving home after Maddy's baby naming on Saturday night, we had some very hairy evenings during which Maddy had a very difficult time sleeping and would cry inconsolably for no apparent reason. This has given us a newfound resolve to develop routines...particularly around bedtime...and stick to them. It will no doubt be difficult. We enjoy our life, and up until this point have found Madelyn very adaptable. She has slept when she's needed to sleep, regardless of where we are or who we're with. However, at this point it's clear that she is getting old enough to require some limit setting and habituating on our part. I think we've seen the past few days what can happen when we don't respect this need, and we are thus committed to doing what we can to provide her with the stability and predictability she is starting to crave. I am sure we will notice that she thrives on her routine, and I'm doubly confident that it will make life easier and happier for us all.

We had a fabulous time at Maddy's simchat baton Saturday night. This literally translates to something like "Joy of the Daughter," but is more like a ceremony that welcomes Madelyn into Judaism and gives us an opportunity to introduce her to the community. Our celebration was intimate and very special; we were surrounded by family and friends who we love, and we were incredibly moved by the blessings everyone wrote for her at our request. We plan on creating a little "blessings booklet" for Maddy, and I'm sure it will be a treasured keepsake from the event. The letter that Ethan and I wrote to her is pasted below.

All in all, despite the craziness of last week's various events, it was well worth it!





Dear Madelyn:
Your Hebrew name, Talia Raizel, honors your paternal great-grandmothers, Thelma and Ruth. Your great-granny Thelma was a strong and independent woman. I remember her as being resolute and tenacious, filled with integrity and fiercely committed to her family and community. She was also a wicked bowler, had a legendary sweet tooth, and was said to be gracious and always a lady! Your great-grandma Ruth was known for tellin’ it like it is. She was honest, sharp-witted, and devoted to her family. She was known as “Babe” by those who knew her best. She would have loved to have met you. We know in some way she had a hand in helping me get back to Boston in time for your arrival. We like to imagine the two of you passed each other somewhere on your respective journeys in and out of this world.
At the conclusion of tonight’s ceremony, we will light candles to celebrate the seventh night of Hannukah. Though I’m sure in the years to come you will most look forward to the presents and latkes…which your Bubbe makes exceptionally well…the holiday is actually about miracles and moments that bring light into darkness. It is no coincidence that your naming is taking place during this special time. You are the miraculous act of creation, the miracle of a promise fulfilled, and the joyful embodiment of the miracle of love. You are the light that we brought forth to illumine our lives and the world around us. In Pirkei Avot it is written, “It is not up to you to complete the work, but neither are you free to desist from it.” We know in the years to come you will shine bright, bringing hope and healing to those things broken and doing your part to realize the mitzvah of tikkun olam, or repairing the world.
Madelyn, you came into this life with your eyes wide open. The Zen Buddhists believe that an oak tree is brought into creation by two forces at the same time. Obviously, there is the acorn from which it all begins, the seed which holds all the promise and potential, which grows into the tree. Everybody can see that. But only a few can recognize that there is another force operating here as well—the future tree itself, which wants so badly to exist that it pulls the acorn into being, drawing the seedling forth with longing out of the void, guiding the evolution from nothingness to maturity. My wish for you as you emerge into the person you are destined to become is that faith be the key setting on your directional compass. Trust life and it will teach you, in joy and sorrow, all you need to know. Believe in yourself and the people around you. Know that you and the surround are not separate; you are connected to it all and never alone. You were born into a family and a community that is dazzled by you and loves you deeply.
We are incredibly blessed and honored to be your parents and are so excited to help guide you and be part of this adventure that you are embarking on. We think you are cute and groovy. Even though you won’t remember these first weeks of your life, we’re here, as we always will be, loving you, relishing in your accomplishments, cheering you on, comforting you, and keeping our fingers crossed that tonight you’ll sleep for at least 6 consecutive hours. We’re here to hold you, dance with you, sing with you, and celebrate you……. today and always.